


Lunch Break

by minkhollow



Category: Daria - Fandom, Sneakers
Genre: Crossover, Gen, otw_onlinecon
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2008-11-11
Updated: 2008-11-11
Packaged: 2017-10-02 02:56:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1900
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/minkhollow/pseuds/minkhollow
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>This is one job where Carl doesn't care for the undercover work.  On the other hand, the only people at Lawndale High likely to see through his cover story aren't going to call him out on it.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Lunch Break

**Author's Note:**

> Written for an otw_onlinecon challenge, involving crossing one's first and most recent fandoms.  
> Sneakers belongs to Universal Pictures; Daria belongs to MTV.

Daria's not around today; home sick, presumably, since her sister's put in an appearance (and criticized Carl's flannel shirts yet again). Jane is, though - which is good, since she's one of two relatively sane people Carl's talked to since the guys _took_ this stupid job - and it's a fairly nice day, so they're having lunch outside. Jane's drawing something, when she's not making a dent in her sandwich, and Carl's trying to sort through his notes.

"So," Jane says, without looking away from her sketchbook, "what are you _actually_ here for?"

"Already told you. I got kicked out of my last school."

"Could be, but I'd say that happened a lot longer than a week ago. I have four older siblings - they at least put in appearances, even if Trent tended to sleep through class and Wind was probably too busy mooning over half the girls to really pay attention. You don't act like you're used to high school anymore."

Carl sighs. "I knew this was a stupid cover story, but the guys wouldn't listen. I think Bishop met the quarterback and figured he was a good example of the student body."

"And Kevin is, for the most part. But us smart people gotta stick together - saves everyone else the trouble of throwing in the adhesives." Jane smirks a bit. "Anyway, it's not like we'd rat you out to anyone, so you might as well answer the question."

He can only assume Daria will hear about it later, but that's all right. Jane's got a good point about the lack of other people who'd listen.

"I'm supposed to be getting an inside look at things," he finally says. "Your principal wanted the school's security tested, for some reason she didn't really go into--"

"No, wait, don't tell me, because it'll bring honor and glory unto Lawndale High." Jane draws out the name of the school the same way the principal did, in the preliminary meetings about the job, but with at least a double helping of sarcasm.

"...I take it she does this kind of thing a lot?"

"_Oh_ yeah. Last time, it was forcing everyone to do volunteer work so that she could get some kind of award. Didn't work out as well as she thought, and I'd expected her next plan would be to make some kind of fuss over the yearly career aptitude tests."

"This is only confirming the feeling that she's a little crazy."

"Well, if you want, we can bail you out of this. I pass the story on to Daria, she passes it to her mom with emphasis on what _parts_ of the security you guys are testing, Mrs. M threatens to hit Ms. Li with some kind of civil-liberties lawsuit, and presto. Problem's solved."

It takes a moment or two for Carl to work up to a fitting response. "I probably don't want to know why it sounds like you two've had practice with this kind of thing."

"Lots of it. At least this time she's not appropriating my artwork."

"It's a tempting offer, I'll give you that. But I'll at least have to run it by everyone else - and odds of us getting in trouble in the fallout aside, I have a feeling Mother won't want to give up just yet, even if the rest of the guys do."

Jane raises an eyebrow. "Why is a grown man going around calling himself 'Mother,' first of all?"

Carl shrugs. "No idea where he picked up the nickname. I think mostly he's just too paranoid to use his real name."

"Fair enough, but what the hell could he possibly find so interesting about being in a high school?"

"Trying to see if he can talk Daria's sister and her cohorts out of using makeup entirely, I think. Said he's got a list of horrible chemicals for every major brand out there, and he's already scared them off a good half a dozen. He's having fun with it, and it doesn't drive the rest of us crazy, so we're just letting him go for a while."

"And it's a noble goal, to be sure. But I doubt anyone will actually remember it once you guys clear out." The sound of the bell ringing filters out to the quad through various open windows, and Jane sighs. "Speaking of clearing out, that would seem to be our cue."

"I thrill to the idea of yet further academia." He doesn't, actually, particularly since science is next on the roster. The other guys _owe_ him for subjecting him to this place's faculty; the history guy's at least entertaining, but there's no computer specialist to speak of, the English teacher's way too much of a wet blanket for anyone's good (least of all his own), and that Fury of a science teacher can't stand the inkling of the idea that Carl's probably smarter than she is.

"No wonder Daria likes you so much."

"You sure about that?"

"Positive. She can put up with your company for five consecutive minutes."

And that, he supposes, makes this job a success no matter what happens in the end.


End file.
